"Chinese President Hu Jintao will be at the White House [this] week. The good news is, he has no plans to foreclose. We can stay another month." --comedian Jay Leno
"The American Bar Association reported Monday that the recession has resulted in fifteen thousand fewer lawyers in the U.S. They haven't disappeared. Yesterday at McDonald's the cashier at the drive-thru window spilled coffee on my lap, then offered to represent me." --comedian Argus Hamilton
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